Reality is an illusion created by lack of alcohol.!
Cigarettes and coffee: an alcoholic’s best friend !!!!
An alcoholic is an egomaniac with an inferiority complex.
If you wish to keep your affairs secret, drink no wine.
A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
Your body is a temple, but keep the spirits on the outside.
They say that alcohol kills slowly. So what? Who’s in a hurry ?
You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
Alcohol is not the answer, it just makes you forget the question.
Don’t drink and drive, you might hit a bump and spill your drink.
You don’t have to be a beer drinker to play darts, but it helps.
An alcoholic is someone whose feet are firmly planted in thin air.
The alcoholic’s mind is like a bad neighborhood, don’t go there alone.
Alcohol doesn’t solve any problems…but then again, neither does milk.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.
A toast to alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.
Alcohol is a perfect solvent: It dissolves marriages, families and careers.
Everybody should believe in something; I believe I’ll have another drink.
The first thing in the human personality that dissolves in alcohol is dignity.