Reality is an illusion created by lack of alcohol.!

Cigarettes and coffee: an alcoholic’s best friend !!!!

An alcoholic is an egomaniac with an inferiority complex.

If you wish to keep your affairs secret, drink no wine.

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

Your body is a temple, but keep the spirits on the outside.

They say that alcohol kills slowly. So what? Who’s in a hurry ?

You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

Don’t drink and drive, you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

Alcohol is not the answer, it just makes you forget the question.

You don’t have to be a beer drinker to play darts, but it helps.

An alcoholic is someone whose feet are firmly planted in thin air.

The alcoholic’s mind is like a bad neighborhood, don’t go there alone.

Alcohol doesn’t solve any problems…but then again, neither does milk.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.

A toast to alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.

Alcohol is a perfect solvent: It dissolves marriages, families and careers.

Everybody should believe in something; I believe I’ll have another drink.

The first thing in the human personality that dissolves in alcohol is dignity.