Women get the last word in every argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
Despite my thirty years of research into the woman soul, I have not yet been able to answer the great question that has never been answered: What does a woman want?
I don’t eat snails… I prefer FAST food!
Beet ever so onion there snow peas legume.
Sign in restaurant window: “Eat now – Pay waiter.”
I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
The four food groups: Fast, Frozen, Instant, and Chocolate.
A friend got some vinegar in his ear, now he suffers from pickled hearing.
Men are like fast food…they never look as good in real life as they do on TV..
It’s called “fast” food because you’re supposed to eat it really fast. Otherwide, you might actually taste it.
I think if I have a good breakfast I could go without food for the rest of the day. I think that until about lunchtime.
Crime has already been organized. Now it’s up to the police.
I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.
We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.
Is it true that people become cops because they are too dumb to work at McDonalds?
You’re old when you are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.
Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving and I call those people ‘the cops’
Success is more attitude then aptitude.
Mistakes are stepping stones to success.
Success doesn’t come to you…you go to it.