A child’s greatest period of growth is the month after you’ve purchased new school clothes.
Every teenager should get a high school education … even if they already know everything.
The school board decided to remove speech and debate from the course schedule; there was no argument.
Our school is very low-budgeted; our physics book is so out of date the last chapter deals with combustion.
School is just an elaborate plot by vampires to obtain the blood of teenagers through periodic blood-drives.
In school, every period ends with a bell. Every sentence ends with a period. Every crime ends with a sentence.
In our school you were searched for guns and knifes on the way in and if you didn’t have any, they gave you some.
On my first day of school my parents dropped me off at the wrong nursery. There I was… surrounded by trees and bushes.
Fifth graders in Texas are using worms to recycle garbage from school lunches. But even the worms won’t eat the Salisbury steak.
Pencils and pens are now illegal on school campus; this was made law after a student successfully proved that a sharpened pencil was, in fact, a weapon.
God heals, and the Doctor takes the Fee.
The doctors X-rayed my head and found nothing.
“Doctor, I have a ringing in my ears.” “Don’t answer!”
An apple every eight hours will keep three doctors away.
When they say Doctors are practicing, they aren’t kidding.
I was so ugly when I was born, the doctor slapped my mother.
I was thinking of becoming a doctor. I have the handwriting for it.
9 out of 10 doctors will agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot.
The patient says, “Doctor, it hurts when I do this.” “Then don’t do that!”
When I told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in advance.