If brains were dynamite you wouldn’t even have enough to blow your nose.
I like noise. I need noise. When it’s too quiet, I can hear my brain cells dying.
I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I’m doing.
If the human brain was simple enough for us to understand we’d be so simple we couldn’t understand.
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
The right half of the brain controls the left half of the body. This means that only left handed people are in their right mind.
Okay, brain. You don’t like me, and I don’t like you, but let’s get through this thing and then I can continue killing you with beer.
The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.
The human brain is a wonderful thing. It starts working the moment you are born, and never stops until you stand up to speak in public.
Too young to be this old!
So many candles, so little cake!
I’m not that old! I demand a recount!
Well, this day was a total waste of makeup.
You’re not old. You’re chronologically gifted.
I’m not getting older. I just collect wrinkles!
What did you get for your birthday? Another year!
Blowing out candles is good exercise for the lungs.
Birthdays are nature’s way of telling us to eat more cake.
When is your birthday? 17th January. What year? Every year!
The best birthdays of all are those that haven’t arrived yet.