admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

To have not shot his friend in the face would have sent a message to the quail that America is weak.

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

We’re going to have the best-educated American people in the world.

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between.

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

Americans adore me and will go on adoring me until I say something nice about them.

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

Two hundred million Americans, and there ain’t two good catchers among ‘em.

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

You can find your way across this country using burger joints the way a navigator uses stars.

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

American: One who gets mad when a foreigner curses the institutions he curses.

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

American husbands are the best in the world; no other husbands are so generous to their wives, or can be so easily divorced.

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

The United States is like the guy at the party who gives cocaine to everyone and still nobody likes him.

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

Of course, America had often been discovered before Columbus, but it had always been hushed up.

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

When you’re born you get a ticket to the freak show; when you’re born in America, you get a front row seat.

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

As a nation we are dedicated to keeping physically fit – and parking as close to the stadium as possible.

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between.

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

What middle class? … there’s only seven people left in the middle class – who cares about them?

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

Only in America can a homeless combat veteran live in a cardboard box whilst a draft dodger lives in the White House.

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

In this country you’re guilty until proven wealthy.

admin2   April 22, 2015   Comments Off on

Americans are benevolently ignorant about Canada, while Canadians are malevolently well informed about the United States.