My ex-wife is going to hell on a scholarship.
Remarriage is an excellent test of just how amicable your divorce was.
American husbands are the best in the world; no other husbands are so generous to their wives, or can be so easily divorced.
After five years of marriage, it is devastating to have the person with the good credit move out.
Always get married early in the morning; that way, if it doesn’t work out, you haven’t wasted a whole day.
Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible; in a world where there are more women than men, it pays to recycle.
Divorce: Going through a change of wife.
I think that after the third marriage Georgie tried to claim his divorce attorney as a dependent.
France may claim the happiest marriages in the world, but the happiest divorces in the world are made in America.
Getting divorced just because you don’t love a man is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
A wife lasts only for the length of the marriage, but an ex-wife is there for the rest of your life.
I’m 34 years old; I thought I’d be divorced by now.
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
Desertion: The poor man’s divorce.
Divorce: A splitting headache.
My mother always said don’t marry for money, divorce for money.
I’m single now, and it’s really weird for me to be dating again because, for the last three years, I’ve just been cheating.
Alimony: The high cost of leaving.
I don’t think I’ll get married again; every five years or so, I’ll just find a woman I don’t like and give her a house.
Alimony: the ransom the happy pay to the devil.