Maintenance-free: When it breaks, it can’t be fixed…

May the bugs of many programs nest on your hard drive.

WARNING: Keyboard Not Attached. Press F10 to Continue.

According to my calculations the problem doesn’t exist.

Nobody has ever, ever, EVER learned all of WordPerfect.

A user friendly computer first requires a friendly user.

Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.

True Multitasking = 3 computers and a chair with wheels!

You never finish a program, you just stop working on it.

All computers run at the same speed…with the power off.

Programmers are tools for converting caffeine into code.

A hacker does for love what others would not do for money.

Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later.

Best file compression around: “DEL *.*” = 100% compression

Computers: working daily to make the human brain obsolete.

SUPERCOMPUTER: what it sounded like before you bought it.

Of course I know how to copy disks. Where’s the xerox machine?

Difference between a virus and windows ? Viruses rarely fail.

The definition of an upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in.

Men are from Mars. Women are from Venus. Computers are from hell.