If we’re all God’s children, what’s so special about Jesus?
I think that I would be a good father… especially if my baby liked to go out drinking.
Baby: Morning caller, noonday crawler, midnight bawler.
Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave when they think that their children are naive.
Every book is a children’s book if the kid can read.
Every child has a right to go to high school and end up with a third grade education.
My daughter… she failed her drivers test; she couldn’t get used to the front seat.
In a house where there are small children the bathroom soon takes on the appearance of the Old Curiosity Shop.
If you have trouble getting your children’s attention, just sit down and look comfortable.
You can’t scare me, I have children.
I wrote a few children’s books… not on purpose.
The Children are the future. Today belongs to me!
Grandchildren are God’s reward for not killing your kids.
A teacher is a person who used to think he liked children.
Children need love, especially when they do not deserve it.
Children brighten up a home: They always forget to turn off the lights !
Women should not have children after 35. Really… 35 children are enough.
Don’t teach your children the value of a dollar if they find out , they’ll ask for two.
The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents,… and the second half by our children.
If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor!