Category Archives: Animal One Liners

At what age is it appropriate to tell my dog that he’s adopted?

What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus? Can I hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand?

A cat, by any other name, is still a sneaky little furball that barfs on the furniture.

Careful! Angry dog in the backyard! Please do not crush him.

Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines. …

There’s a pigeon walking up the driveway. I don’t care what he wants. I’m not answering the door.

What happens to a frog’s car when it breaks down? It gets toad away.

The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue.

What did the boy bird say to the girl bird on Valentine’s Day? Let me call you Tweet heart!