In principle, I can stop drinking, the thing is – I don’t have such a principle.
Heading out for drinks, bail money’s on top of the fridge.
You won’t drink away the alcoholism.
I’m not an alcoholic. Alcoholics need a drink, but I already have one.
I know my limits: if I fell down it means enough.
It’s better to be a worldwide alcoholic, than an Alcoholic Anonymous.
Don’t drink while driving – you will spill the beer.
A man enters a store and says: “15 litres of wine please.” “Did you bring a container for this?” “You’re speaking to it.”
All the problems fade before a hangover
You can consider yourself lucky in life, if the cognac you drink is older than the woman that you’re sleeping with.
Tequila is a good drink: you drink it and you feel like a cactus; the only problem is that in the morning the thorns grow inward.
I am not an alcoholic. I simply enjoy living in liquid medium.
Why is there so much blood in my alcohol system?
A person has to have a warm heart and a cold beer.
Don’t forget that alcohol helps to remove the stress, the bra, the panties and many other problems.
Unfortunately, but sometimes a woman can’t find herself a man. She doesn’t like the drunken ones, and the sober ones doesn’t like her.
No! for the last time stop asking if i am drunk. I am not drunk! Who would name their kid drunk?
If you see me with a water bottle, there’s probably vodka in it
The speed of light is when you take out a bottle of beer out of the fridge before the light comes on.
My girlfriend told me to go out and get something that makes her look sexy… so I got drunk.